How to Eat an Elephant

Thank you, I believe I am ready to order.  I will have the elephant, please.

Oh, wow! That’s the elephant special, huh? It looks great!  But, uh, how does one even begin to eat an elephant?!

One bite at a time?  Thanks for that advice.

Currently, I am staring wide-eyed at my over flowing plate and paralyzed by this pachyderm.  I’m still looking for the utensils and have no idea where to find a napkin.

So, why is it that I’ve ordered the elephant off of the menu…knew it was coming…and yet, now that I am served it, I have no idea how to eat it. I am beginning to second guess my choice.  Why didn’t I just order the meatloaf?! I know how to eat meatloaf!

Well, here I sit.  Looking.  Contemplating that first bite.  Do I start with the head? Or maybe the tail? How about the foot?  It’s got a really tough exterior… You know what, maybe I will just sit and stare at it some more…

And some more….

And some more…

What do you know?!

It didn’t shrink at all.

I bet something will come to me while I season it.

Could I have some salt and pepper please? Oh, it’s under the elephant you say…with the utensils and the napkin.

Alright, so, if Melinda Mae can eat a whale…

 

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I can eat an elephant!


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